We're just your RunoftheMill Celtic DRUNKS!
by Sheniqua 17
Summary: Eira and Niamh Saorise are two girls who have just come to Boston for Saint Patty's day and of course, run into the Saints. Soon, they're in deep with the Russian mob and only the Saints can keep them safe...no matter how many times Eira and Niamh protest
1. Chapter 1

Well, hello all. I was sitting around on Saint Patty's and saw the Boondock Saints playing on Spike TV. My brother liked the movie so I thought, It can't be all that bad. And I fell in love. I now have bought the movie like three weeks ago, the Two-disc unrated edition and it has a special place by the DVD player so I can pop it in whenever I have an urge to watch two hot Irish guys cap some mafie guys. I'm italian so it's kinda fun to watch the stereotypical italians running around. My friend and I decided, of course, to write a fanfic.

DISCLAIMER: Sadly, only Troy owns the Boondock Saints...But I do own the story line, Eira, Niamh, Mary and Yuri. I don't own Viktor because he's a butt monkey and nobody likes him.

Pronunciation of Names: Niamh: NEEV

Eira: AY-rah

Saoirse: SEER-sha

The cool gray evening in Boston brought a sigh of relief from a girl sitting in the passenger seat of an old beat up Ford truck. Actually she was far from a girl. She was of the female persuasion, but she was twenty-two years old. Her dark hair up in a low ponytail away from her sleepy gray eyes. Sitting up straight, her back popped and she gave a slight grunt as a twang reverberated through her spine. Rubbing the side of her face, she leaned over and pressed the heel of her hand against the horn of the Ford. Several people looked toward the truck but only one shouted at her with a string of muffled obscenties. The woman smiled evilly and waited ten seconds before pressing the horn again. The person she was annoying gave a scream and stormed over to the truck a few seconds later. She had unruly curled hair, highlighted brilliant green against the natural burnette and red highlights, her dark amber eyes alive with annoyance at her friend. They sat in the truck for three minutes, the second girl glaring at the first and the first had an idiotic grin on her face. The first then reached over and hit the horn again gaining a smack on the arm from her friend.

"Why?" The second asked the first emphasizing the word with another smack.

"Hehe...you shouldn't suck face in front of people you don't know." The first shot back dodging a third blow.

"You shouldn't draw attention to your ugly self!" The second shouted at the first.

"You shouldn't date a mullet."

"That was one time and you know it was just so I could sit in his Mustang."

"I could've sworn you were about to say ON his Mustang."

"You are disgusting. My gods, Eira, get your mind out of the gutter." Eira laughed and buckled up her seat belt.

"Sure whatever Niamh. I'm the one with my mind in the gutter but you're the one sucking face with a dickhead...does that mean that you were giving him a blowjob?" Niamh stopped midbuckle and looked at Eira. She blinked and buckled herself before turning over the engine.

"I really hate you." was all she muttered before driving off into the heart of Boston.

Three hours later, the truck was parked in front of an old, slightly decrepid hotel and the girls came out of one of the rooms. Eira was dressed in a black and dark red striped low-cut shirt, a pair of hip-hugger jeans and a black wool trenchcoat that stopped the new crisp wind. Niamh was weaing a white tanktop and a low faded black jeans and a bright red wool trenchcoat. They strode down the Boston sidewalk with a stride that made men stare after them and women glare after them. Slowly, the sun dipped behind the horizon and the lights came on. They laughed and talked the entire way. In unison, they turned down Somerset Street and made their way into the crowded bar, Kinsale Irish Pub and Restaurant. Upon entering, they were assaulted by the smell of rich alcohol and stale cigar and cigarette smoke. Niamh coughed and Eira slapped her on the back with a grin before hopping over to the bar and ordering a pint of their darkest lager. Niamh followed but instead bought a bottle of vodka and grabbed a shotglass. The waitress smiled at them and shook her head lightly. They were the only women who had entered the bar all night and now they were going to drink their pants off. Probably in one of the mens, who were watching them intently, bed. Eira and Niamh sat happily chugging their drinks and getting as rowdy over the basketball game as the men. At one bad call, Eira stood up and screamed such an obscenty, that the men turned to look at her then cheered on in agreement. The game ended and the girls paid for their drinks. The bottle of vodka in Niamh's hands as they exited, declining to several mens propositions for a ride home. Walking down the chilled Boston streets in early fall slightly sobered the girls up but they diminished any of that with the bottle of vodka that they passed to each other. Soon, they were lost. Surprise, surprise. They looked for familiar landmarks but being as smashed as they were, they were lucky they were still standing up. I don't say straight (as in standing up straight) because they weren't; whenever they could they were leaning against buildings or each other and when they had nothing to lean against, they walked leaning to the side until they ran into something to hold them up. Which most of the time, it was themselves. After banging their heads together for the tenth time, Eira stopped and took in their surroundings. Not like she'd remember them in the morning but, what the hey. They were next to a dark alley. That was all she could gather before a man ran out of the darkness and grabbed her around the middle. In the process, the man knocked over Niamh, who just lay on the ground. Eira was pretty sure she blacked out but was worried more about herself as the man squeezed her abdomin and the threat of puking washed over her. She hated throwing up, especially alcohol. Two more men ran out of the alley wearing black ski masks and carrying guns.

"Don't shhoot. Imgonna...be sick." Eira slurred out bending over. Before she knew it, the two were chanting some type of prayer and the man was yelling out for someone to come and help him. A sharp crack rang out and the hold on her abdomin, which was holding her up, loosened and she felt a slight splatter on her back. Even though being more sloshed than a frat boy at a party, Eira knew it was blood that splattered on her back and that evenings contents boiled back up. Falling to all fours, Eira emptied her stomach and felt someone pull her hair back. Then she blacked out. The figure holding her hair back gave a yelp of surprise and grabbed her before she landed face first in her own vomit. The first hauled up Eira while the second went to Niamh. Carefully gathering them up, the two figures ran back into the alley way were a third waited for them. Without a word, they went to the end of the alley and put the girls in the back of a car putting them leaning against each other at one end of the car while the first figure slide in next to them. The third figure went to the drivers seat and the second slid into the passenger seat. The cars engine turned over and they drove off away from the dead man, vomit and approaching sirens.

The next afternoon, Eira woke to a splitting headache and an unfamiliar bed. Looking over, she found Niamh sleeping on another bed (actually they were mattresses on a floor) slightly groaning and pressing the heel of her hand against her eyesocket.

"I will never drink vodka again." Eira groaned, slightly wincing at the pain in her head caused by the weariness of her voice.

"Ditto." Niamh whispered. Sitting up, the first thing Eira saw was a pile of dirty clothes...actually piles of dirty clothes strewn around aimlessly and all of hers were still on. Her shoes and socks as well as Niamh's sat at the end of the bed next to their jackets. Eira yawned and rubbed the back of her neck. Something grated against her skin and she looked at her hand. Small flakes of a brown...something had rubbed off on her hand. Then, the nights events replayed, although slightly slow and blurry, in her mind and she felt the wave of nausea again. Running over to the door, she threw it open and sprinted to a nearby bathroom to get sick in. Dry heaving because she had already emptied her stomachs contents earlier, Eira heard some talking and then a cool washcloth press against the back of her neck.

"It'll be alright. Jest calm doon abit." A male voice said with a deep gaelic accent of some sort. "Connor, watch'er while I check on the other girl." The washcloth left and then returned.

"Da's right. Jest calm down. It's jest alittle blood." Eira stopped heaving and sunk down to press her head to the side of the bowl. It was freezing cold and felt as good as the washcloth. "Ye done pukin' now?" the 2nd male voice asked and all Eira could do was nod. The second guy, Conner, gently helped Eira up and walked her over to the rinky-dink table where Niamh sat with a glass of water and bottle of Asprin.

"You're right. No more vodka for you. Actually, I say no more alcohol for you." Eira grunted at Niamh and grabbed the bottle popping four pills in her mouth and washing it down with her water. Eira was about to say something else when her eyes fixed on a mask. Why it hadn't clicked before, she didn't know. But it clicked now and someone flicked the freak-out switch. Eira was up and began to back herself away from the table. There were three men in the room; one was much older than the other two, with gray hair and beard and wise old eyes, the next had a rugged face and dirty blonde hair that was messed up, probably from lack of being combed, the last had a young face but looked just as old as the second, he was rugged with a mole above his lip on the left side, much dark hair adorning his head but both had brilliant blue eyes.

"Is yer friend there looney or what?" the one with dark hair asked watching as she backed up.

"I stopped paying attention after she sent a shrink to the looney bin." Niamh answered laced with dead seriousness.

"You killed that man." Eira said not letting her eyes leave them. The two younger one's eyes grew wide and they held their hands out.

"Please, don't do anythin' rash now." the dirty blonde said as he and the other slowly advanced forward their hands outstreched.

"I wouldn't try to chase her down, three years of soccer and four years of fast pitch will make anyone a decent sprinter." Niamh said (she always adds the most useful bits of information.) not moving from her place, the older man stood behind her as if she tried to make a move, he could stop her. Eira's breath quickened and she glanced around for a way out, still backing up. All she could think was that they were being held captive by these three men for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. There was a door at the other side of the room that had a deadbolt lock on it, so Eira assumed that that was the door out. The men were spaced just far apart she couldn't go through them or around them. She felt her back bump against the wall and she tried to squish into it. The lighter haired of the two gently went forward and went to grab her wrist. Slamming her elbow into his cheek, Eira ducked under him and sprinted around him, dodging his brothers lunge for her. She made it to the table before she saw movement out of the corner of her eye. The old man had moved past her somehow and stood in front of the door . Having no traction on the wood floor and all her momentum going in one direction, Eira ran straight into him and he wrapped her into a deep, bearhug, making it unable for her to move. Eira didn't struggle she just remained in an angry pout as the other two men stumbled over.

"Why didn't ye back meh up?" The lighter haired one smacked the darker haired one.

"I didn't know she was gonna do that!" the other shouted back, lashing out himself. They began to wrestle and mutter obscenties.

"Boys. Please, not infrent of the women." The older man mumbled in the deep gaelic voice that rumbled throught Eira. He set her down next to Niamh, who still hadn't moved. "Please, don't run. We mean ye nor your friend any harm." He looked her in the eyes and Eira stuck out her bottom lip before nodding. She felt like a little kid that got put in time-out. "I must go now, so please. Don't ye harm any o' my sons now bein' the big bad women ye are. I see that bruise comin' in on yer cheek, Connor." The lighter haired one, Conner, gingerly touched his cheek and winced. Then he left. Just like that. Eira sat there for a second, before lunging for the door only to find the old man on the other side. "Don't think about leavin'." he muttered shutting the door and locking it from the outside. Eira went back to the table and sat down, sulking.

"Why haven't you tried to run?" She angerly asked her friend.

"I have a hangover. And besides that I can't run, are you kidding. I'm preparing myself for tomorrow." The obvious brothers looked at each other and Conner scoffed,

"Where do ye think yer goin'?"

"It's Saint Patricks Day, ain't it?" She shot back and the brothers looked at each other.

"Shit, Murph. Whadda we gonna do wit'em?!" Murph, the dark haired brother shrugged.

"I dunno...Why don't we take'em with us, not like they'll go anywhere."

"Nah, Da'll have our hide's if we do..."

"I am not spending Saint Patty's Day sober, thank you very much! One of you go out and buy a crapload of alcohol and a game of Twister and we'll have our own party." Eira looked at her clearly insane friend and practically screamed,

"My gods Niamh! These two kill a man, are holding us prisoners and you want to play fucking Twister with them!"

"If you haven't noticed Eira! We can't help the situation and I'm gonna go out with a bang! It's fucking Saint Patty's day and I wanna get smashed. Throw in a game of Twister and I could really give a flying fuck who we are playing it with and what they did!" Eira opened her mouth to retaliate but it was cut short by Niamh lunging herself on her. They wrestled across the ground, completely forgetting about the brothers, who were laughing their asses off at the two. The two girls stopped mid-tussle and looked at the brothers.

"I feel self-concious, how 'bout you?" Eira asked Niamh from her place on Eira's stomach.

"Oh yeah." Niamh stood and helped her friend up. They took their places at the table again and looked at the men.

"So...Why did you guys kill that man?" Niamh asked looking Conner in the eye.

"Well, ye two have te understand what we do for...what're the words I'm lookin' for Murphy?" Murphy rubbed his bottom lip and shrugged,

"It's not really a livin' but it's a job ain't it." They looked at each other as if prying into each others thoughts.

"So why did you kill that man?" Niamh asked again with a hint of impatience added in.

"We...kinda...kill evil men if you will, to rid the streets of mobsters, pimps and druglords. That man was a mafioso, so we killed'em." Murphy smiled at his brother who squinted his eyes at him as if he was trying to read his brothers mind.

"So...you think your like, superheros or something, 'cause you're killin' evil men?" Eira asked and looked at Niamh. They stared at each other for a second before bursting out laughing.

"That is the most insane thing I've heard yet!" Niamh laughed holding her sides. Conner and Murphy rolled their eyes and Conner muttered

"Bekommen Sie die Handschellen." in German to his brother. His brother shot

"Froh, wenn es sie verschließen wird." back and left the room, returning with a bag. Eira and Niamh were sprawled out across the table, still laughing, until they felt something cold and metal clamp across one wrist each. Then another cold metal bracelet wrapped itself around the other wrists. Their laughing stopped and they looked at their wrists. The jerks had handcuffed them together then to the table they sat at! Eira and Niamh glared at the two who looked very satisfied with themselves.

"Now, we have te go make a phone call, and ye two'll stay right here." Conner smirked pulling on a wool jacket.

"Behave ye two." Murphy gave them a boyish grin before following his brother to the door and locking it as it clicked shut. Eira looked at Niamh who was glaring heavily at her.

"I blame you." Niamh said and Eira's jaw dropped.

"Me! Why me?! I'm not the one who agreed to take the job...before Saint Patty's!" Niamh bit, yes bit, Eira's arm and got thumped by her shoulder.

"Ow! Stupid bobbypins!" Niamh exclaimed. Eira sat waiting for Niamh to figure out what she had just said. "Ohhhh." Niamh sighed and pulled one out with her sort of free hand. Attacking the lock, she sat there for two minutes before it clicked and the wrist released.

"This is way to easy. I feel like we're in the movies...or a story or something." Eira commented and Niamh nodded as she unlocked the other side of the handcuffs.

"I say to be evil, we leave them a note." Niamh announced loudly. Eira stopped and muttered,

"A note?" Niamh nodded gleefully and Eira shrugged, "Sure why not."

Well, that's chapter 1. Please R&R!

**Bekommen Sie die Handschellen. means "Get the handcuffs."**

**Froh, wenn es sie verschließen wird. means "Gladly, if it will shut them up."**


	2. Chapter 2

Chappie Two introduces new characters and adds to the plot. **ALSO! I rated this M for language mostly and probably some other things that may or may not go on later...** Continue please!

When Conner and Murphy returned to their apartment, all they saw instead of two girls attached to a table, was one set of handcuffs, a bobbypin and a note. Moving to the table swiftly, Conner tore open the note and scanned it quickley before exclaiming his anger with, "Fuck!!!" Murphy looked over his shoulder and pushed his hands into his dark hair.

**Hey boys!!!**

**You should really consider thinking of better holding situations...and maybe search us next time, HA like we're gonna meet again! You see that little bobbypin...oh yeah, got passed the handcuffs and door, what now?! Anyways, we won't go to the police because well, we're-FINE EIRA! I won't put that then! Oh, by the way...NANANANANA! I'm sticking my tongue out at you and Eira is dancing around in her lacy undergarments! OW! YOU WIJFJE! Gah...welllllll see you in the after life! **

**Eira and NiamhWhy is your name first? **_**Not now, Niamh!**_

Murphy cursed and slunk into the living area.

"What'll we do now, Con?" He called to his brother who crumpled up the paper and threw it into a corner.

Miles from the brothers apartment, Eira and Niamh slunk into their motel room and grabbed their bags. The trucks engine started with a slight choke and then they drove off. Without a word passed between them, they drove to another apartment building about middleclass-ish. They shut off the truck and went to the door. Jumping up the stairs, two at a time, they ran to the fourth floor and began to bang on the closest door.

"Yuri, we know your in there! Open up the fucking door!" Niamh shouted banging angrly on the door while Eira looked around nervously. The door was thrown open and they were met with a tall, scrawny man with large green eyes and messy black hair, as though he had just woken up.

"Why?!" He yelled being shoved to the side as the girls entered.

"We need a place to stay for a while, so we chose here. Deal with it." Niamh muttered, throwing her bag in the bathroom and following it. Eira went into the bedroom and left Yuri staring at the closed doors. They reopened to reveal Eira in jeans and a longsleeved black shirt and Niamh in jeans and a red tee shirt.

"Thanks by the way." Eira said as they grabbed their wool jackets and left. Yuri sat there a second and stared at the door.

"What the HELL!!!" He yelled and they couldn't help but giggle lightly as they ran down the stairs and out the building. The air was a bit bitter cold as they walked down the street instead of driving. Soon, Eira had a grin come across her face and she began to giggle. Then the giggle progressed into a side-splitting laugh. Niamh stared at her friend and silently raised an eyebrow watching people who stared at Eira. Some people even ran across the street to avoid walking passed her.

"Eira...what have I told you about doing drugs before we go to work?" Eira waved at her friend and wiped her tear stained cheeks.

"Oh...I-I-I just realized...those guys were damn fine...and we ran away from them! We are idiots!!!" Niamh looked off into space and slapped her forehead.

"I hate it when you make a point!" She screamed at her friend before grabbing Eira's arm roughly and dragging her the rest of the way. Stumbling up the stone steps, they walked in and were instantly stopped by their boss. A lean man with medium length strawberry blonde hair that was combed back and high defined cheek bones.

"And where the hell have you two been?!" He yelled in his cold voice.

"Sorry, Smecker, we kinda ran into some problems." Paul Smecker looked over the girls coldly and shrugged,

"Well, I guess I would be late too if I had spent all night drinking!"

"It's not that!" Eira yelled back, her anger spiking rapidly, "On our way to our hotel room, this guy ran out of an alley way and two guys killed him, then took us prisoner and we had to escape from their apartment building this morning! I puked at the place and am a little cranky, SO BACK OFF!" She finished her rant with a scream and Smecker looked at them more intently.

"These, uh, guys...would they happen to be brothers? Irish brothers?"

"Well, they had a gaelic accent and yeah they were brothers...who are they?" Niamh stared at Smecker, her gaze piercing his skull.

"The locals call them the Saints of South Boston. They go around killing mobsters and mafiosos."

"Yeah, they told us, and their names are Conner and Murphy, we know! Why aren't they in prison?" Eira was now piercing their boss with her stare.

"Nobody has gotten any leads on them, I can't arrest them without a warrant and all the judges are chalk full of cases, so don't go into it, let it go." And he walked off...with the girls hard on his heels.

"Smecker!" they shouted in unison and he took a sharp turn into his office and slammed the door shut in their faces. Eira slammed her fist into the wooden frame and they turned at the sound of laughter. A tall skinny Boston cop with dark hair sat at his desk, lightly laughing at the girls.

"What the hell are you laughing at, Greenly?" Eira shot stalking over to stand over him. Greenly put his feet up on his desk and just continued to laugh. Grabbing his feet, Eira shoved him over and watched as he fell onto his back and shot her a heated glare. Niamh pulled Eira away from the ego-bruised man into a dark room. It was lined with file cabinets and a small woman sat at a desk looking over articles and putting them in certain folders.

"Hey, Mary. I want to see all that you have on the Saints of South Boston please, if you would be so kind. You don't even have to get up just tell us where the cabinet is." Niamh smiled at the cop.

"M'sorry girls, but Smecker has all those files in his office." Niamh's head fell to her chest, "But we do have some newspaper articles on them." she added hopefully, rising and going to a far cabinet. Opening the middle drawer, she flipped through several pages before a look of confusion crossed her face.

"That's odd...their gone. I wonder if Smecker has them, he's been on that case ever since the first murder."

"When was the first murder?"

"About a year ago. These two brothers got in a bar fight with these Russian crime syndicate thugs and the thugs took one of the brothers to kill in an alleyway, the other brother dropped a toilet on the thug, that held the gun to his brothers head and jumped on the other thug from a six story building. They were let off of all charges, but then other mobsters, pimps, mafiosos, every evil man began to drop dead. Then, about nine months ago, during the trial of the Yakavetta boss, Papa Joe, they stormed the courthouse and with their father, killed the boss and told everyone that they wouldn't stop until they were all dead or changed their evil ways, pretty much." Mary explained, "Now get outta here, I've got work to do." she waved them out and huddled over the articles again.

"Hey, Sayorsy!"

"It's Saoirse! SEER-sha! Sound it out!" Eira yelled at Greenly.

"Whatever. Smecker gave me this to give to you. It's a mob shooting at-"

"Wait. Why didn't Smecker give it to us himself?" Eira walked over to Greenly and hovered over him.

"He left a few minutes ago. Anyways, it's a shooting at-"

"You mean, he's gone?" Niamh joined her.

"Yeah." Greenly thrust the folder into Eira's stomach. "Take it. It's at Somerset Street." And he left. Eira looked at Niamh, who was already at Smeckers office door. He had left it unlocked.

Three hours later, Eira and Niamh stood at a brutal shooting of three Russian thugs. Eira stood looking at the surrounding buildings while Niamh poked and prodded at the bodies. Eira something off about an alley close to the murders.

"Hey, Niamh. What does that look like over there?" Niamh looked at where Eira was pointing.

"Well, Eira. That looks like a shoe, still attached to the foot. Which I hope to God is still attached to the leg which is attached to the body of a bum."

"Sadly," Eira muttered walking over to the body with Niamh, "I don't think bums get pedicures or wear high-heeled bright pink flip-flops." It was a tall blonde woman in her late twenty's. She had the fake tan, platnium bleach blonde hair and bright blue eyes fogged over. A few feet from her lay another woman. This one was dark haired, but also had a tan and fogged over blue eyes. They were wearing matching jean short-shorts - Both Eira and Niamh thought the same thing, _ IN MARCH?!_ - and very sheer pink and white tops.

"Well, they didn't leave much to the imagination did they?" Niamh asked Eira as they looked at the wounds. Two bullet wounds to the stomach. A very slow painful death. Eira shook her head and sighed as two cops stalked over.

"Hey, ladies. What do we got?" Smecker mumbled around a cigarette as he walked up behind the cops.

"Two more DB's probably got caught watching the shooting and were thusly, killed." Niamh said turning to look the detective in the eye.

"Do you think your Saint's did this?" Eira asked from her place looking at the murders.

"No," Smecker dropped the cigarette butt to the ground and squashed it, "They don't hurt innocents. It's against their rules."

"Oh, really?" Eira shot out, laced with sarcasm.

"Yes. Really." Smecker shot back with an equal portion of venom. Eira clenched her fists, her anger rising again. It was something she was working on. Constantly.

"Well, since we're heading this case. I want files on these two," Niamh pointed to the women, "And those three. Send it with a cop to Yuri's apartment." Niamh grabbed Eira and dragged her to their police car. The officer stopped a block from Yuri's and let them out. The cold Boston air cooled Eira off as they finished their walk to the house, their arms full of files and paper. Eira followed Niamh into Yuri's apartment and threw her stack of papers onto a table.

"You like a little coffee with your bourban right?" she laughed as she walked into Yuri's kitchen. Niamh grinned as she began to seperate the papers into phone bills, news clippings, letters and murder files. Eira joined her and set down a coffee cup filled to the brim with bourban. Niamh began to read through some of the letters as Eira began to work on her stack of papers. Smecker was actually helping the brothers. He helped them break into the courthouse during the Yakavetta trail with their father and kill Yakavetta in front of his family and the families of several men Yakavetta had killed. Eira began to go through phone bills to try and find a phone number while Niamh ordered their dinner from a chinese restaurant. A police officer arrived with the files of the women and thugs soon after. The food arrived and was spread out among the files and papers. Hours passed as the girls went over file after file and munched away on the greasy yet delicious food.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY HOUSE?!?" Yuri's screams came from the entrance way.

"We have commindeered-nauticle term-your house for the use of..well..your looking at it." Niamh said with a grin. Eira simply ignored him as she read through files.

"First, lay off Pirate of the Carribean. Second, no more chinese food and third, WHAT THE HELL?! My house stinks of oil and alcohol!" Yuri screamed manuvering around the papers and cartons of food.

"The smell of alcohol was here long before we showed up and probably before you showed up, I will not lay off Cap'n Jack Sparrow, he's a hotty and I love chinese food like I love vodka, it's addicting and better than sex. So NAH!" Niamh stuck her tongue out at Yuri and went back to looking at the thugs files. Eira let out a giggle and changed files.

"And what do you have to say about this, Eira?" Yuri stood over her and looked at the file. Eira closed the file and looked up at him. Yuri could never come off as threatening to these girls, they had known him too long,

"I say, 'Yo Ho, Yo Ho, A pirates life for me!'" She smiled taking a bite out of sweet and sour pork. Yuri glared at her and stole the box of pork.

"I hate you, girls." He hissed. Eira pulled out another box of pork and grinned.

"We know." He stole that box too and ran into his room. Eira pulled out, yet another box and sulked over it. Niamh laughed at her until Yuri ran in and stole her box of chinese food and ran back into his room as sanctuary. Then they grabbed forks and instead of the chopsticks they had before. Now it was war. Yuri learned that the hard way. Sneaking back into the living area, Yuri went to grab Niamh's other box and was jabbed in the hand with the fork. Now the files were coated with oil, and any other stainable stuff in the chinese food and Yuri's blood. The information from that day was swimming around both girls minds and overtaking their senses. Eira, gathered up her stacks and stumbled into the dinky little kitchen. Pulling out a bottle of Crown Royal, Eira took a sip, then another and another.

"Niamh," Eira called and her friend looked up from her papers, "What if these are copycats? Actually, I'm almost certain these are copycats, but they probably know the system well. The two women, have nothing but a speeding ticket. What were they doin' at the crime scene?" Eira took another sip.

"I dunno." Niamh muttered throwing down the papers and running her hands over her face, "Listen, whaddya say, tomorrow we see if we can do some undercover work. I know it's a little sudden but, it's the only thing we can do right now." Eira walked over and passed her the bottle.

"Don't tell me, call up Smecker and convince him." Niamh shrugged and took two small sips of the rich liquor.

"I'll do it in the morning. Just because, I'm tired and I really don't want to talk to him right now." Niamh and Eira laughed lightly. The Crown Royal was emptied and the girls fell asleep in the tiny living area. Eira sprawled across the floor and Niamh on the couch. Yuri woke them early in the morning and got a faceful of chinese food. Cursing, Yuri picked up the papers laying around the room and threw them on the small table he had between the kitchen and the living area. One of the folders plopped open and he went to close it only to stop and give a light chuckle.

"What happened to this guy?" He pointed to the picture and Niamh stumbled over to look at it. It was a picture of one of the men found the day before.

"That guy was killed in an alley yesterday. Part of a Russian crime syndicate thing." She grumbled rubbing her eyes. Yuri looked from her to the picture, then laughed again.

"Well, that isn't the guy that the name says he is." Eira joined them and gave him a puzzled look.

"What did you say?" Yuri pickd up the folder and pointed to the name. Viktor Pashkovski.

"This isn't Viktor. I'm meeting with Viktor today. He wants to talk to all the guns for hire in the city. This might be a lead to take the trail off of him." Yuri looked at the folders of the other man and two women. "This is that guys brother, father and their two wives. They were in Viktor's mob but they were really low and most of the time stayed out of trouble." He continued, talking about it as easy as talking about the weather.

"Can you get us a meeting with him..as in a undercover meeting?" Eira smiled at him.

"So you can bust him." Yuri said unamused.

"No...just catch him in the act is all...then bust him." Yuri gave Eira an unamused look and smiled.

"Well, of course. Why don't I stick a target on my forehead and yell 'I did it, please kill me!' while I'm at it?"

"Well, it would be an improvement of attitude on your part." Niamh said from her spot, leaning on the counter. Yuri glared at her and wiped at his face. There was still a thick coat of oil on it (even though he had scrubbed it thoroughly) and he sighed.

"I dunno, guys. Talk to your boss and get a hold of me later."

"How much later?"

"I don't know...how about in an hour." Eira looked at Niamh, who grabbed the phone and began to dial.

"All right. I'll page you." Yuri nodded and grabbed his thick jacket. Leaving, Yuri locked the door behind him and went on his way to do what ever he did during the day. This left the girls to deal with Smecker.

End of Chappie 2...So sad...Well, please R&R!


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you to Ceilidh-Kay and Akecheta for the reviews!**

Sweet Chapter 3 is up! Please read...

Smecker spoke quietly into the phone, a cigarette hanging lazily from his thin lips. A slight trail of smoke danced up to the ceiling along with the other two ribbons of gray.

"Alright, see what you can get on him. And tell Yuri that I'd like to talk to him tomorrow...Hehe, I know. But I wish to speak to him-...Fine." And he hung up. "That was the two girls you two took hostage." The brothers looked up at Smecker and let the smoke roll surprised from their mouths.

"What're ye talkin' about?" Conner blinked at Smecker who in turn rolled his eyes and took another drag from his cigarette.

"The day before yesterday they saw you when you killed that man. They "escaped" and came to work. I told them to lay off tryin' to find you guys but now they are more motivated than ever. Apparently, three Russian peons and two of their wives were killed and they tried to make it look like you did it. They are going to go undercover and watch the boss tonight. At McGinty's. One of their friends, who's a gun for hire, will let them in. They are going to be pretending to be hookers. Sadly, they probably will forget and give themselves away. It's Saint Patty's. They are going to get drunk off their asses. You thought they were bad that night you picked them up, think how they'll be tonight." The brothers looked at each other.

"Whaddya mean tonight?" Murphy bored his gaze into Smeckers head.

"I want you two to watch over them. More than likely, they'll get in deeper than they can handle. Especially being drunk. And since I know you two can hold your liquor better than them, I want you to watch them," he threw down a wad of bills, "And have a few drinks on me." Conner looked at the money then back to Smecker.

"We can't and 'side's that, they could recognize us." Smecker grabbed the money and threw it in Conner's lap.

"They'll be too drunk to remember what you look like and the boss will be there along with all the guns for hire. Just don't shoot the man with black hair and green eyes with a prick attitude and you'll be fine." That ended the conversation and the brothers left.

"Conner, I really don't wanna do this."

"I know, Murph. But, it's da least we can do for Smecker." Murphy rolled his eyes and light up another cigarette.

"Why's Smecker so intent on keepin' these girls safe?" Conner shrugged and rolled his shoulders to relax them.

"I dunno, Murph, but he does. And I want to stay in his good graces fer as long as possible." Murphy nodded in agreement as they strode to McGinty's. Stepping inside, the brothers were enveloped with the smells of alcohol and cigarette smoke. Three men sat at a booth and spoke quietly to each other among the festivities. Murphy and Conner took a seat at the bar and smiled at Doc.

"Hey b-b-b-boys, h-how've ye been?"

"Alright, hey Doc, how long've those men been sittin' there?" Conner motioned to the men at the booth.

"T-t-they've been der s-s-since de parade-FUCK! ASS!" Conner and Murphy nodded and looked over at the men again, taking sips from their green beers. The first was larger than the rest and had blonde hair and black eyes. His pale skin flushed. The man to his right was skinny and had black hair and grey eyes. The man to the first's left had dirty blonde hair and blue eyes that were dark with uncertainy.

"Those must be the guns fer hire." Murphy motioned to the men, "They look too relaxed te be a couple of peons." Conner agreed with his brother and they waited. Joining a few aquaintences to have several beers with, they waited until it was dark out.

"I don' think their showin' up." Conner whispered to his brother. But he spoke too soon. Two more men walked in; a tall man with no hair and piercing hazel eyes strode in with a man with black hair and striking green eyes. The second man made eye contact with the brothers and he nodded. Murphy blinked and Conner nudged him.

"That must be the friend." Murphy nodded. Then the two girls strode in. One in a short jean skirt and a very tight, very showy white camisole and see-through red overshirt. The other wore tight black leather pants and a red and black V-neck shirt. They had green shamrocks paints on their cheeks and their lips were painted bright green with lipstck. Walking up to the bar, they leaned over the edge and each gave Doc a kiss on the cheek, leaving bright green lipmarks on his red flushed cheeks. He handed them a pint of green beer each and they smiled and left to join the men. Murphy and Conner had managed to stay unnoticed and watched them intently. The patrons in the bar grew until they were packed to capacity. Sure enough, after a few more (like five) drinks, the girls were tipsy and the one wearing the camisole pulled her friend to the jukebox that Doc never played and put in a quarter. Soon, a good irish beat began and all the men turned to look at the girls who were dancing around. The song was Druken Lullabies by Flogging Molly. The two jumped up on the nearest table and began to sing along with the lyrics;

_Must it take a life for hateful eyes  
To glisten once again  
Five hundred years like Gelignite  
Have blown us all to hell  
What savior rests while on his cross we die  
Forgotten freedom burns  
Has the Shepard led his lambs astray  
to the bigot and the gun_

Must it take a life for hateful eyes  
To glisten once again  
Cause we find ourselves in the same old mess  
Singin' drunken lullabies

_  
_The girls danced across the tables, causing men to cheer happily at their jubilance. They linked arms and spun around quickley before beginning to dance and sing again._  
I watch and stare as Rosins eyes  
Turn a darker shade of red  
And the bullet with this sniper lie  
In their bloody gutless cell  
Must we starve on crumbs from long ago  
Through these bars of men made steel  
Is it a great or little thing we fought  
Knelt the conscience blessed to kill_

Must it take a life for hateful eyes  
To glisten once again  
Cause we find ourselves in the same old mess  
Singin' drunken lullabies  


Now the girls were scooping up drinks and downing them. The men began to clap or stomp along with the beat as the girls sang out again. The men had made a circle around the girls and were whooping and hooting.

_  
Ah, but maybe its the way you were taught  
Or maybe its the way we fought  
But a smile never grins without tears to begin  
For each kiss is a cry we all lost  
Though there is nothing left to gain  
But for the banshee that stole the grave  
Cause we find ourselves in the same old mess  
Singin' drunken lullabies_

I sit in and dwell on faces past  
Like memories seem to fade  
No colour left but black and white  
And soon will all turn grey  
But may these shadows rise to walk again  
With lessons truly learnt  
When the blossom flowers in each our hearts  
Shall beat a new found flame  
Must it take a life for hateful eyes  
To glisten once again  
Cause we find ourselves in the same old mess  
Singin' drunken lullabies  
Cause we find ourselves in the same old mess  
Singin' drunken lullabies  
Singin' drunken lullabies

As the song ended, one of the Russians handed the girl wearing the leather pants a martini. She looked from the drink to him and shouted over the music,"What is this? This isn't alcohol! This is what rich pricks substitue for alcohol 'cause they can't hold their liquor!" she yelled at the man. The young man standing over by the russian mob boss, gave Murphy and Conner a look and motioned toward the girls.

"Aye!" yelled Murphy as he forced his way to the table, Conner right behind him, "And what's with the olive?! It's like putting an apple slice in bourban!""Exactly!" The girl screamed whipping around to look at the man who agreed with her, "Shit." she sighed as he grabbed her legs and picked her up off the table.

"Carry me!" He heard from behind him as Conner grabbed the other girl. The forced their way out of the bar and made their way to Rocco's old car their father had left a few nights ago. Making Murphy get in the back with the girl he carried, Conner plopped his girl in the passenger seat before sprinting around the car and getting in. The car started and they drove off, not waiting to see if anyone had followed them. It was silent in the car except for the girls insistent laughing. Soon that gave way to silence, and Conner heard from behind him,

"Uh, Con. Drive faster." Murphy said quickley. Conner glanced back and began to laugh at the sight. The girl had actually sat herself on Murphy's hips, straddling him. The girls friend looked too and began to giggle,

"Go get'em, Eira. God knows you need to get laid." The first girl, Eira, without looking back, smacked her friend. Conner was too busy trying to stay on the road that he was afriad to look back at his brother. The entered the parking lot to the apartment building that they lived in and Murphy jumped out of the car before it was stopped. He walked briskly away from the car and leapt up the steps three at a time. Conner helped the girls up the stairs to their room.

"Now, why'd ya have te go an' scare me brother like that?" he laughed at Eira and she smiled,

"He's a cutie, right Niamh?" Her friend, Niamh giggled,

"He's like his brother!" she then overexaggeratedly slapped her hand over her mouth and looked at Conner, who merely rolled his eyes.

"You're possibly the first girl te embarrass Murph. Other than our ma. Ye should feel lucky." Eira smiled and nodded as they entered the loft and Conner helped the girls sit on the small couch they had. The brother's Da sat at the table, smoke curling from the cigar in his mouth and a smile teased at the edges of his lips.

"So, de girls cracked Murph."

"Actually, the one in the leather pants did." Conner clarifyed. They heard a yell from bedroom as Murphy heard them talking about him. Conner stifled a laugh and pulled out a cigarette, lighting it. Eira stumbled over to the fridge they had and raided it. Pulling out two beers, she nodded to the men and stumbled back over to the couch. Soon the girls started up in another song.

_I bang on the door but you won't let me in_

_Cause your sick and tired of me reeking of gin_

_Ye locked all the doors from the front to the back_

_And left me a note telling me I should pack._

_I walk in the bar and the fellas all cheer_

_And order me up, a whiskey and beer_

_And you ask me why I'm writing this song, _

_Some call it a tavern but I call it home._

_Fuck you, I'm drunk, Fuck you I'm drunk_

_Pour my beer down the sink, I've got more in the trunk_

_Fuck you, I'm drunk, Fuck you, I'm drunk_

_And I'm going to be drunk 'til the next time I'm drunk_

_You've given me an option, you say I must choose_

_Between you and the liquor, then I'll take the booze_

_I stumble all flustered down to the South side,_

_Where I'll sit down and exercise my Irish pride_

_Fuck you, I'm drunk, Fuck you, I'm drunk_

_Pour my beer down the sink, I've got more in the trunk_

_Fuck you, I'm drunk, Fuck you, I'm drunk_

_And I'm going to be drunk 'til the next time I'm drunk!_

Conner looked at his Da, who shrugged. Conner grabbed himself a beer and joined the girls. Da left after a while and the trio kept drinking late into the night. Conner soon passed out with the two girls, who drank him under the table, on the couch in the early morning. The sun washed over him in the morning and he struggled to the bathroom. Heaving into the toilet, he spit and flushed away the contents only to be shoved out of the way and half-laid on by Niamh, who was retching into the toilet. Conner waited until she was done to get up out from under her and grab a glass that was sitting on the sinks edge. Filling it with water, he handed it to Niamh, who took a mouthful and swished out the taste, spitting into the bowl before flushing it down. Conner copied her and spit into the sink, washing the sides.

"Where's yer friend?" he muttered, expecting her to be in there after Niamh.

"I dunno. When I woke up she wasn't anywhere." Conner blinked at her and ran from the room. Throwing open the bedroom door, he found Murphy laying on his bed and Eira next to him, curled up in a ball but fully clothed.

"Murph!" Conner yelled and Murphy opened his eyes,

"What?" he grumbled.

"What the fuck is this?" Conner gestured to the slumbering woman next to his brother,

"She came in here last night, apologized, then passed out. I wasn't gonna move her." Murphy sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"Hey now. If you're gonna be sleeping in the same bed as my best friend, wear some pants." Niamh said striding in and poking her friend in the eye. "Eira! Wake up ya lazy bum!" she yelled in her ear. Eira swatted at her friend and smacked her across the face. "Why you little-!" Niamh leapt on her friend and pushed her face in the mattress, "This is what you get for smacking me!" Conner and Murphy calmly watched,

"So," Murphy rubbed his neck before grabbing a pair of jeans, "You just gonna suffocate her or what?"

"No," Niamh said, "Just give her a wake up call." Niamh stood up and Eira rolled over to glare at her. Stopping to stare at the two men staring at her, Eira raised an eyebrow and looked around,

"What?" she mumbled. Conner and Murphy merely shrugged and Murphy grabbed a shirt, pulling it on as he and his brother left the room. Eira and Niamh stumbled after them and flopped on the couch that Niamh and Conner had passed out on. Murphy grabbed a can of Pepsi and a wool jacket. He pulled on the jacket and cracked open the pop as he stumbled from the apartment.

"Where's he goin'?" Niamh pointed after Murphy.

"He's gonna call Smecker." Conner said tossing the girls each a soda and lighting himself up a cigarette. They sat in silence for a while as the girls sipped on the sodas. Conner rooted the ktichen and produced a large frying pan, a bowl, a gallon of milk and a carton of eggs.

"Need any help?" Niamh mumbled around the mouth of her soda can. Either Conner ignored her or didn't hear her because he set the materials down and continued to work. Cracking five eggs and mixing them with milk in the bowl, he continually flicked his ash into a nearby tray. As Conner poured the mix into the pan, Murphy entered the room again and instantly went to his brothers side, talking in a hushed whisper. Conner looked at the girls then back to his brother. They were speaking a language that Eira and Niamh didn't know. Conner asked Murphy a question and his brother shurgged.

"Well, tell'em." He said quietly before going back to the food. Murphy sighed and walked cautiously over to the girls who sat with raised eyebrows.

"Listen girls, apparently, they found out 'bout ye and yer friend. So, uh, Smekcer want's us to keep ye here-"

"WHAT?!" Both girls screamed. Murphy flinched and rubbed one ear.

"They got a hold o' yer friend and he's in bad shape." The girls calmed down and he continued, "Smecker wants us te take ye te get yer clothes and keep ye here 'til yer friend gets here."

"Who?' Niamh asked rubbing her temple.

"I dunno. Someone named Caoimhe? Caoimhe Senga."

"Oh...Caoimhe is going to kill us." Eira dropped her head between her knees and grimaced. Conner looked at Niamh as he set down a huge bowl of scrambled eggs in front of them. Eira looked up, breathed in and slapped her hand over her mouth, sprinting for the bathroom.

"Eira has this thing with eggs and hangovers. They don't mix." Niamh explained taking the fork stuck in the bowl and shoveling a huge bite into her mouth. "But on the plus side, these are better than the ones that we usually get." Conner looked at the door to the bathroom and shrugged. He grabbed three more forks and went to the bowl but Niamh stopped him, "She won't it eat it. Even on an empty stomach, she refuses to eat eggs when she has a hangover." Conner sighed and threw the extra fork down. Eira joined them after a while, shooting evil glares at the bowl. The brothers dad soon rejoined them and sat beside her.

"Now, why aren't ye eatin' nothin' lassie? Ye gotta work off that hangover." he taunted her taking a huge bite of eggs. She gave him an unamused look and retorted with,

"I don't eat things that come from the butt of an animal that eats its own crap." The clatter of silverware rang through the room as the brothers and Niamh threw their forks down.

"I hate you." Niamh glared heavily at her and Eira smiled,

"Glad I could be of service." She shot back standing. "So, when we gonna go get our stuff?" She asked walking into the kitchen and opening the fridge.

"In 'bout ten minutes. One of us'll take the car, while the others walk." Niamh and Eira looked at each other from across the room.

"Rock paper scissors for who walks? You lose, you walk." Niamh said and Eira nodded. Sticking their hands out, they bounced them up and down three times and Eira left her hand in a fist while Niamh flattened hers out.

"Yay! Paper beats rock! Now for who you have to go with." they bounced their hands again and Eira stuck two fingers out in a piece sign while Niamh kept hers in a fist.

"Yay again! I choose to go with Conner." Eira sighed and went back to her search for food. She pulled out a box of cold pizza and opened it up. Picking up a large piece of pepperoni, she rejoined them and took a bite out of the old food. The brothers father watched them and looked at Conner and Murphy. After Eira finished her slice of pizza Conner and Murphy gave them clothes to change into and waited patiently and the girls changed.

"Boys, I remember when I first met yer ma. She was a fiesty t'ing, always talked back and could hold 'er own in a fight."

"Oh c'mon da. Not now." Conner whined and Murphy rubbed his face.

"These two girls remind me of yer ma some'in' horrible. I wish ye two could find some girls like dis." The conversation ended as Eira came walking out in Murphy's long-sleeved black shirt and Conners destroyed jeans. Niamh folllowed in Conners tight black t-shirt and jeans. The brothers pulled on their wool jackets and gave the girls their jackets. Conner and Niamh left first and when their car got down around the corner Eira and Murphy left.

...And Review! Did you like that nice transistion, eh, eh? No? Oh, Okay...Anywho Next chappie'll be up soon!


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